I'm pretty sure that I have an insurance learning disability. I just don't get it. It doesn't matter how many times someone explains it to me; I just don't get it. I can't understand how it works. I am so frustrated. I feel like a freakin' idiot. This is absolutely ridiculous. How do I keep ending up having to pay for more and more stuff?
i.hate.this.
Thursday, July 30, 2009
Monday, July 27, 2009
Time
I don't knwo what has been up with Time lately, but it seems like every time I check the time, it is waaaaaay faster than it should be. Like just a little bit ago it was midnight. And then a little bit later, and I am talking what seemed only like minutes, it was 12:38. I made a mental note, and planned on getting things wrapped up with my Facebook stalking, and go to bed. Then I looked down at the clock and it was 1:32.
This has been happening a lot of the last week. It's kind of really annoying. Especially because time goes slower when I really want it to go faster.
This has been happening a lot of the last week. It's kind of really annoying. Especially because time goes slower when I really want it to go faster.
Saturday, July 25, 2009
Tuesdays at the TT
All the crazy things happen on Tuesdays at the Tulane Tower, or as I affectionately call it: the TT. The Tulane Tower is another one of the sites that houses Delgado's GED program. It houses a very interesting mix of people. It is just up the block from the City Hall, around the corner from both the men's and the women's prisons, and across from the Sheriff's Offices and the county jail where two of our teachers teach. If you have never been to the prison district of a major city...It isn't maybe the most, uh, beautiful place to be. If you like the flashing neon of signs reading "Bail Bonds" and the raving red and blue lights, then this is the place for you. Once I went to the corner store to get a snack and man showed me how he could cut the top of a beer can off with his remaining teeth.
The inside make up of the building is a rather unique mix of people, quite of representative of the city itself. There are two GED programs, ours, and another that is geared for 16-24 year olds, many of whom are court mandated to be there. In addition, there is the New Orleans AIDS Task Force, probation officers, the DA's office, and drug counseling, among other things. There is secure parking lot, where the manager of our GED programs had her Lexus stolen, and my bike was stolen. There is security at the front door and a police officer on our floor.
Everything bad that happens there happens on a Tuesday. Which coincidentally happens to be the day that I am usually there. My bike was stolen on a Tuesday. There have been screaming matches between two flamingly gay men, one our student and the other a schizophrenic that goes to the other GED program. One of the people from the drug counseling program upstairs followed one our female students around. 3 of our students were arrested and threatened by the police. Always on Tuesdays.
The worst things happened this week. Apparently it is the season for break ups. Myself and apparently a bunch of our students decided that it was time to break up. We had two extreme cases of crazy exes come to the Tower. I have always heard the myth of a crazy ex, but I had never truly experienced it for myself. I hope I never have to experience it again. It seems pointless to explain the situations and, perhaps, a breach of privacy. Long story short, one crazy ex, a female, showed up and threatened our male student. The other crazy ex threatened one of our female students .
The thing that frustrates me the most is their lack of trust in the justice system. Both of the students spoke with our police officer about the situation. But because both of them refused to ask for ask for help, the police officer could do nothing. Both students are minorities that come from a background that traditionally has not been helped or supported by the system. They come from a background where they can't trust the people who are supposed to help them. I worry about them.
Blah, blah, blerg. Just more ramblings.
The inside make up of the building is a rather unique mix of people, quite of representative of the city itself. There are two GED programs, ours, and another that is geared for 16-24 year olds, many of whom are court mandated to be there. In addition, there is the New Orleans AIDS Task Force, probation officers, the DA's office, and drug counseling, among other things. There is secure parking lot, where the manager of our GED programs had her Lexus stolen, and my bike was stolen. There is security at the front door and a police officer on our floor.
Everything bad that happens there happens on a Tuesday. Which coincidentally happens to be the day that I am usually there. My bike was stolen on a Tuesday. There have been screaming matches between two flamingly gay men, one our student and the other a schizophrenic that goes to the other GED program. One of the people from the drug counseling program upstairs followed one our female students around. 3 of our students were arrested and threatened by the police. Always on Tuesdays.
The worst things happened this week. Apparently it is the season for break ups. Myself and apparently a bunch of our students decided that it was time to break up. We had two extreme cases of crazy exes come to the Tower. I have always heard the myth of a crazy ex, but I had never truly experienced it for myself. I hope I never have to experience it again. It seems pointless to explain the situations and, perhaps, a breach of privacy. Long story short, one crazy ex, a female, showed up and threatened our male student. The other crazy ex threatened one of our female students .
The thing that frustrates me the most is their lack of trust in the justice system. Both of the students spoke with our police officer about the situation. But because both of them refused to ask for ask for help, the police officer could do nothing. Both students are minorities that come from a background that traditionally has not been helped or supported by the system. They come from a background where they can't trust the people who are supposed to help them. I worry about them.
Blah, blah, blerg. Just more ramblings.
Monday, July 20, 2009
Homesick.
I haven't been good at keeping in touch lately. And by lately, I mean the last six months. Life is too busy.
A brief rundown of all the things happening.
-Fourth of July consisted of cover bands at an overly priced fest in a homey town. It would have felt like home if I hadn't been with a bunch of uppity east coasters.
-Kyle was here for a week for a much overdue visit. We saw gators giant spiders that were the size of my hands in the swamp, Kermit Ruffins, Public Enemies (the whole time I kept elbowing him saying, "that's such and such street! I saw this set!"), and the great state of Louisiana via river whilst tubing. We even had a movie moment when we got in my car and a roach flew out of nowhere; we both screamed in unison. It might still be in there.
It still fascinates me how people come into your life and become a part of you. Most of the time, I think you don't even know it until all of a sudden you say something you never thought you would or you do something you never thought you'd do or you feel a feeling you didn't know you had. Good byes are hard.
-We spent this last weekend in Florida at the beach. GLORIOUS. The good news is that I did not get attacked by a shark. We saw dolphins and white wales and caught one little crab with one pincher named Shirley. We were hoping to catch enough crabs to have a crab boil, but Shirley lucked out. She was set free. BJ was sure she was going to take one of my fingers with her, but I decided to keep it. We went swimming off the pier and sailing on the SS Molly with the Elks Club, and even took in a stowaway. My friends here make me not so homesick when they can. And so does watching the sun go down. I should do it more often.
-I have plans now for post-Americorps, but I'm not sure I'm happy with them.
a. Finding a new apartment.
b. Working at Delgado part time as an assistant to the program effectiveness person (that sounds way more complicated than it is) + still scooping ice cream
c. Making a writing contract with myself to write consistently and working up the courage to start submitting stuff.
d. Saving money.
e. Waiting for my litigation to absolve itself.
f. Trying to ignore the Chicago shaped hole in my heart.
g. Planning where I'm going next in the world.
-I'm disgustingly homesick.
a. There aren't oceans at home though.
b. But there aren't sharks in Lake Michigan either.
c. I'll have to think on that.
A brief rundown of all the things happening.
-Fourth of July consisted of cover bands at an overly priced fest in a homey town. It would have felt like home if I hadn't been with a bunch of uppity east coasters.
-Kyle was here for a week for a much overdue visit. We saw gators giant spiders that were the size of my hands in the swamp, Kermit Ruffins, Public Enemies (the whole time I kept elbowing him saying, "that's such and such street! I saw this set!"), and the great state of Louisiana via river whilst tubing. We even had a movie moment when we got in my car and a roach flew out of nowhere; we both screamed in unison. It might still be in there.
It still fascinates me how people come into your life and become a part of you. Most of the time, I think you don't even know it until all of a sudden you say something you never thought you would or you do something you never thought you'd do or you feel a feeling you didn't know you had. Good byes are hard.
-We spent this last weekend in Florida at the beach. GLORIOUS. The good news is that I did not get attacked by a shark. We saw dolphins and white wales and caught one little crab with one pincher named Shirley. We were hoping to catch enough crabs to have a crab boil, but Shirley lucked out. She was set free. BJ was sure she was going to take one of my fingers with her, but I decided to keep it. We went swimming off the pier and sailing on the SS Molly with the Elks Club, and even took in a stowaway. My friends here make me not so homesick when they can. And so does watching the sun go down. I should do it more often.
-I have plans now for post-Americorps, but I'm not sure I'm happy with them.
a. Finding a new apartment.
b. Working at Delgado part time as an assistant to the program effectiveness person (that sounds way more complicated than it is) + still scooping ice cream
c. Making a writing contract with myself to write consistently and working up the courage to start submitting stuff.
d. Saving money.
e. Waiting for my litigation to absolve itself.
f. Trying to ignore the Chicago shaped hole in my heart.
g. Planning where I'm going next in the world.
-I'm disgustingly homesick.
a. There aren't oceans at home though.
b. But there aren't sharks in Lake Michigan either.
c. I'll have to think on that.
Tuesday, July 7, 2009
ankle-bitten
this is just a friendly neighborhood warning not to get an ankle-biter. today i got bit by a chihuaha while going for a walk through the neighborhood. i have a blood blister on my thigh because of it. i hate those things. chihuahas, not blood blisters.
Wednesday, July 1, 2009
maybe tomorrow.
i've been mia lately. mostl because it's been the only thing i've been able to be lately. i'm a hurricane of emotions. it's hard to keep my sanity in the heat. i've never been good at being rational anyway, but this oppresses me.
my americorps time will be up in a few weeks. i think six. i don't know what is going to happen to me after that. it has been a really unbelievable year. when i think back on everythign that i have experienced this year, i am overwhelmed. i want it to be over with, but i cna't imagine saying good bye to the students who have taught me so much. i can't imagine working with the staff that has become my family this year, taking me to the hospital, dealing with my craziness, laughing til we cried, and sending me when home when i needed to cry. i've invested a lot of myself to that place.
i have an option to stay on with delgado part-time as an administrative assistant if i choose. i wouldn't have to start over. the program is going to making some big changes, and i would get to help make that happen. it would be only part time because adult education is based on grants and state funding, and it would only be guaranteed til december. to a normal person, that might not sound like a good deal. but to someone with commitment issues and doesn't know how much longer they are going to stay in this place, it's tempting.
what are my other options? americorps? another year of insanity. another year of health insurance. another $5000 towards my loans. another commitment to a place i'm not sure i want to spend a whole nother year in. another place to live. another year of poverty and too many bills and two jobs.
this is so HARD. i know when i move, i'm going to miss this place. it's crazy here. the people are special here. but i am homesick for CHICAGO.
god. this is like reverse seasonal depression.
this isn't as crazy as it gets, but pardon my ramblings. it's the stress and the heat and the frustration and the exhuastion setting in. maybe tomorrow i'll know what to do.
my americorps time will be up in a few weeks. i think six. i don't know what is going to happen to me after that. it has been a really unbelievable year. when i think back on everythign that i have experienced this year, i am overwhelmed. i want it to be over with, but i cna't imagine saying good bye to the students who have taught me so much. i can't imagine working with the staff that has become my family this year, taking me to the hospital, dealing with my craziness, laughing til we cried, and sending me when home when i needed to cry. i've invested a lot of myself to that place.
i have an option to stay on with delgado part-time as an administrative assistant if i choose. i wouldn't have to start over. the program is going to making some big changes, and i would get to help make that happen. it would be only part time because adult education is based on grants and state funding, and it would only be guaranteed til december. to a normal person, that might not sound like a good deal. but to someone with commitment issues and doesn't know how much longer they are going to stay in this place, it's tempting.
what are my other options? americorps? another year of insanity. another year of health insurance. another $5000 towards my loans. another commitment to a place i'm not sure i want to spend a whole nother year in. another place to live. another year of poverty and too many bills and two jobs.
this is so HARD. i know when i move, i'm going to miss this place. it's crazy here. the people are special here. but i am homesick for CHICAGO.
god. this is like reverse seasonal depression.
this isn't as crazy as it gets, but pardon my ramblings. it's the stress and the heat and the frustration and the exhuastion setting in. maybe tomorrow i'll know what to do.
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